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click here! (update)

You know when you have so much on your mind you can't think clearly? You don't know where to start? It's like being so tired but you just keep tossing and turning. Where to begin? Where to begin? Ahhh! yes! since I just did a questionnaire their are things I'd like to address to the recent surge of new-comers. Theres really no specific place to begin because I typically ramble through these blogs. But I had a a question about printing on Converse and I Brought up how I though it was no different than printing on champion. And what I mean when I say that is I consider a Chuck Taylor a "stock" shoe. I think of it as a blank t-shirt. same goes for the Vans slip on. It's a blank canvas, there's literal ads that advocate customizations of their shoe. The same goes for Dickies, Carthartt, Levis... they're all blanks to me. Take the labels off what do you have?

I come across pages that rebuild and customize old Jordan's and sb's and I wonder too how they can just tweak a few pieces and call it something new. Also what makes someone's custom dunks better than another person's custom dunks? How is it that people are verified with 245K on insta and they are making essentially bootleg jordans. Like they are using nice material and know how to properly build a shoe i'm sure, But what I'm saying is no matter what it's not nike verified.. so its a bootleg. right? But now that they are "established" and they have their pictures with drake and lil uzi, Nike is cool with them making custom shoes with their logo on them. It's a tough act to follow and I don't stick my nose too far into the topic cuz at the end of the day does it really fucking matter what shoes playboi carti has on?

Can I be absolutely clear and upfront? Lately I have been feeling so indifferent and stuck and part of the reason is that I can't stand the fact that it's all been done before. I have a plethora of graphics but I look at them collect dust and think that they are derivative and very contrived. I am not good at drawing but I try my best. The way I draw is I'll doodle until I make something thats kinda cool looking. And then I'll just draw it over and over until one works out. Although sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes you just walk away after hours empty handed. It's so weird dude other times you can just whip something up in a few minutes and everything works out so well. I also have this thought that lingers on the back of my head that is about incidentally and subconciously doing something that another person has done. It's hard to avoid. my mind plays tricks on me. Like the ideas that pop into your head could be someone else's that you overheard 3 weeks ago. And you can't remember if you came up with it or that random person you overheard. Y'know what I mean?

I have a lot of graphics. a lot. but I don't think I will be using any of them as of recently. I fear that they are those subconcious ideas that someone will point out and be like. "that looks like..." "yoo this is exaclty like..." I don't want my graphics to be like anything. I want them to be in somewhat of my own style. I wanna differentiate. it's tough. But then I begin to overthink and I realize it's all but a t-shirt. for now...; ) "It's only a t-shirt" this is what I tell myself. when I fuck up... "ahh its only a t-shirt. now I have a test print rag". that's part of the reason why I like what I do because it's so harmless. besides the chemicals and aerosols and emulsion draining and the fumes. hah..haha...umm.. yeah harmless. Well harmless enough when I fuck up. It's not like being a stats major. you screw up some numbers you're fucked homie. Imagine being an open heart surgeon. The pressure.

I wanna utilize Image of fear and blindspot more. I wanna blast all my screens and do an entirely new batch of graphics. It's funny how quickly I get sick of looking at things. It's a noticeable change. I have some ideas and a few graphics already put aside. I think i'll just print out the artwork when the time comes. I guess that's it for now. I typed up about 4 of these and got sick of typing so this is the draft we're going with. I wrote somethings 2 weeks ago. thanks for tuning in. reading is punk!

-image of fear

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